I’m gathering up my courage and going to Deena Metzger's Writers’
Intensive this year. Although I have
always been (and seen myself as) a writer, it’s the Healers’ Intensive I’ve felt
called to three of the last four years.
Until now. I don’t know why the
original call or why the change, but I’m trusting my instincts. In my experience, things start gearing up
well before we get there. Now, a little
over a week before it starts, Deena sent a friend with some health issues the
following:
“What might spirit want? Why did this potential condition in particular
come to you in particular in this particular time in your life and history?
What are you dreaming? Might the dreams be speaking to you? Why this kick in the ass? What might you be
called to? What path emerges for you to walk and if you step on it, you can
tell Spirit you got the message and the potential illness is unnecessary. “
Such good questions. I myself
have cycled back into some familiar unpleasant symptoms and find this most
timely for me as well. This entire
piece, It Begins with a Call, has
been me addressing these questions.
I know Deena would say that what is happening in our
bodies is what is happening to the earth.
Topanga Canyon
Two nights ago I
dreamed a lot. I do not remember any
whole dreams, but I remember five very distinct images:
1. Facing two others, I assume their posture of arms
upraised, bent at the elbows, palms out.
2. Bringing a pomegranate tree in a tub out of a dark
storage place.
3. Bringing cups of tea from a corner shop to my
daughter-in-law and her mother.
4. Arriving on a residential street at night with
others and exclaiming, “Oh, we’re mapping the inner landscape!”
5. Cards with symbols or images on them being placed
down in a square form.
These feel significant, and I think they are connected to
the intensive, but I’m not clear how.
Fragments. But gem-like and
potent. What does spirit want?
I see: the posture of a priestess; Persephone and
bringing the pivotal image of the story out into the light; service; laying out
the divinatory images. But what does it
mean to map the inner landscape? How do
you do that?
There are gaps in my understanding of what to do, what is
needed. There is this:
Mind the Gap II
Life
is full of gaps and holes,
Like
a worn-out rag.
There
are gaps in my thinking,
gaps
in the floor in a recent dream,
gaps
in this old house
where
the rats squeeze through,
gaps
in my understanding.
There
are gaps between what I say
And
what you hear,
Gaps
in my calendar,
Gaps
our hands and feelings
Cannot
seem to bridge.
There
are gaps in the heart,
holes
made by departed loved ones.
There
are gaps in atoms,
Spaces
we cannot see but know are there.
Gaps
are not always bad.
They
may reveal doorways, openings
To
the way out.
Gaps
can be minded,
Carefully
considered,
Filled,
expanded, crossed
Or
simply acknowledged
