The Stages of Cronedom

I've been working on my event for women on aging and the crone archetype (there are still a few spaces - see my previous posts or Facebook event called Going to Hel: Aging and the Crone Archetype), and I've discovered a few poems I'd forgotten that I'd written.  One of the reasons I started blogging was to put these poems out so that they wouldn't get lost in deep storage.  So, here is one I dug out:

First,

you are a novice elder.

Monthly bleeding 

finally ends, 

bringing both relief 

and sadness.

If you are fortunate,

you receive

a crone initiation,

and a welcoming.

You begin to look

at older friends

in a new way.

You study

how they move,

how they rest,

how they persist

in their arts.

Then,

you move into

early cronehood.

You stop coloring

your hair.

You grandparent.

If you are lucky,

you retire from

your day job.

Because you live

within youth culture,

you become invisible

to many.

You wince

at your image

in the mirror,

hating the new lines

etched into your face and

your sagging skin.

Then,

you breathe deeply

and promise yourself

to accept it all.

Next,

you discover

that there is  

a middle-elder phase.

You begin

to identify yourself

as old. 

Sometimes.

Weaknesses in the body

begin to clarify themselves

into symptoms.

It is easy

to get lost and

discouraged now.

You realize

that you will never

go backpacking again.

You visit

your acupuncturist and

chiropractor. 

Often.

If you are even

a little wise,

you turn inward

and to whatever gods or spirits

tug at your soul.

You allow

your gifts

to flow

unobstructed.

You care

less and less

what others

think of you.

You begin

to lose (or lose more)

people.

You understand

how much grief

there will be

from now on .

You wonder

how you will manage

to bless and serve

the young.

Later,

you move into

true old age.

Not yet having 

arrived there, 

I cannot speak of it 

with any authority.

I suspect

that the work

will be to learn more

about acceptance

and about staying

open-hearted.

That opening

to the life-force

and also the death-force

will be

what is required.

I hope

that I live long enough

to hold all things –

to love my beloveds -

to bless the youngers –

and to meld

into the earth.

Maya Spector